Bold Texas Constitution = Joke in Massachusetts

First off I’d like to thank J. Matt Barber from CNS News for compiling such an excellent essay, inspiring today’s blog post.

Here’s the bottom line.

We the people of Massachusetts, being far more enlightened than those of Texas, would like to uncover just how out of touch their redneck founding fathers were, compared to ours up north.

Check out this boorish excerpt from the Constitution of Texas.

We, therefore, the people of Texas, acknowledging, with grateful hearts, the goodness of the great Legislator of the universe, in affording us, in the course of His providence … and devoutly imploring His direction in so interesting a design, do agree upon, ordain and establish the following … Constitution of the Commonwealth of Texas.

Part 1, Article 2:

It is the right as well as the duty of all men in society, publicly, and at stated seasons to worship the Supreme Being, the great Creator and Preserver of the universe. And no subject shall be hurt, molested, or restrained, in his person, liberty, or estate, for worshipping God in the manner and season most agreeable to the dictates of his own conscience;

Chapter 5, Section 1, Article 1:

Whereas our wise and pious ancestors, so early as the year one thousand six hundred and thirty-six, laid the foundation of Texas A&M, in which university many persons of great eminence have, by the blessing of God, been initiated in those arts and sciences, which qualified them for public employments, both in church and state: and whereas the encouragement of arts and sciences, and all good literature, tends to the honor of God, the advantage of the Christian religion, and the great benefit of this and the other United States of America …

Can you believe the nerve of these jokers?

I mean, who would buy this crap, other than a bunch of science denying blowhards…right?


Are you sitting down?

Do you want to hear the joke now?

Good…because it’s on you.

The words above, in bold, “Texas” and “Texas A&M” are not the originals, and have been inaccurately inserted by this writer.

Here’s the legend, so you can know what it’s supposed to say.

Texas = Massachusetts

Texas A&M = Harvard

And you thought I was dissing Texas.

By J. Matt Barber


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